just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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