I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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