I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Randomize