I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
