There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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