Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
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