So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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