please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Randomize
