Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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