He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize