He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize