i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I have aggressive nipples.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
