I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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