He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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