Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Randomize
