There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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