i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
