i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
