Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
