Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize
