i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
