sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Randomize
