hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
