I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
