she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
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