May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
i now understand why vodka
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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