I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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