last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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