I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
