I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
