Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
