Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
