No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
