You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring money and cleavage
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize