Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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