those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
