he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
