This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
