are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
