I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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