READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Randomize
