jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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