people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Everything about him screamed your future.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
