One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
