Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Let's paint friendship bongs
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
