Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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