You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize