it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Two words: blizzard sex
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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