whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
