im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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