plz talk dirty to me
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
